Confidence
“Move into the fullness of your true identity and watch your whole life change.” — Neale Donald Walsch
This quote came to mind as I reflected on the vast impact on all areas of my life that working on, and gaining, confidence has had. I think most people who know me now would describe me as pretty confident, but I remember when I was painfully shy.
The efforts made thus far to overcome shyness and grow in self-acceptance, in part to grow my confidence, has paid dividends well beyond what I would have imagined. It’s opened doors and allowed me to feel sure of myself as I walk through. Confidence has helped me rest easy in my unfolding path, and allow others theirs, without controlling thoughts or behaviors. I trust myself to navigate whatever comes and make the best choices possible with the information and resources I have, as I trust others to do the same. This sense of confidence has brought a great peace and freedom into my life and improved all of my relationships.
Like any trait, it doesn’t constantly persist at the same intensity, but it does persist. It’s easier in some circumstances than others, but can be cultivated. Pushing myself little by little beyond my comfort zone, whenever the opportunity has presented, has proven very valuable. Also, making a list of accomplishments, especially those that highlight courage and resiliency, built confidence by underscoring that it’s there and growing. Choosing what to focus on is everything. It isn’t denying fear or failures, but seeing the triumphs and grace and resting easy in that saddle of “your true identity”.
So seize the opportunities to get out of your comfort zone. Speak up a bit more, shine a bit brighter, try something new. Focus on the effort and not the outcome and celebrate yourself for it. In the short-term, you’ll gain confidence and maybe a new skill, connection or interest. But the ripple effects are an even bigger prize.
There’s many situations where I lack confidence still. But with each step taken, and each success at finding my way “back in the saddle”, it gets easier to get on and stay on as I grow in new directions and continue watching my “whole life change”.
